I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
