I will die if light touches me.
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
