Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
