The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
