part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize