have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
