i just had sex bonerless
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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