Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
