We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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