You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
