To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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