I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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