So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I need a burrito and a hug.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
