I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize