idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize