I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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