You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
