I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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