google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
