shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
