OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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