Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
