marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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