I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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