People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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