when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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