This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize