oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that