Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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