piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
