Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
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