dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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