My brain says no but my pants say off.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
