Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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