I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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