Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
