Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
My underwear smells like fireworks.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
