brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Are we in a gay sports bar?
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
