You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
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open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
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i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
try to milk me bitch
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