You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize