Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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