Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
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