I just made out with a guy for $7.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Randomize