you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
