It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Randomize
