Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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