he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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