I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
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