Texts From Last Night

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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  i only shaved half my leg

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  on purpose

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  (201): i only shaved half my leg (201): on purpose http://tfl.nu/r22e
  Replies (32) Good night (993) Bad night (2676)
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  (212): View more from New York

  You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.

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  (212): You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin. http://tfl.nu/5eus
  Replies (15) Good night (857) Bad night (4678)
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  (585): View more from New York

  This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....

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  (585): This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time..... http://tfl.nu/b6dm
  Replies (13) Good night (3654) Bad night (704)
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.

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  (352): Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break. http://tfl.nu/4l91
  Replies (11) Good night (4296) Bad night (887)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.

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  (256): I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources. http://tfl.nu/m7l9
  Replies (28) Good night (3790) Bad night (1399)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.

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  (978): Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined. http://tfl.nu/nnky
  Replies (4) Good night (3133) Bad night (1249)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities

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  (858): He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities http://tfl.nu/i2zo
  Replies (3) Good night (2842) Bad night (716)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.

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  (217): There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle. http://tfl.nu/aejf
  Replies (1) Good night (611) Bad night (1260)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.

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  (781): perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax. http://tfl.nu/ar2h
  Replies (0) Good night (935) Bad night (1251)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...

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  (585): Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband... http://tfl.nu/78x2
  Replies (6) Good night (634) Bad night (1740)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.

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  (913): The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops. http://tfl.nu/e530
  Replies (13) Good night (1605) Bad night (709)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.

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  (505): Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot. http://tfl.nu/8yik
  Replies (3) Good night (582) Bad night (293)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.

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  (212): last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite. http://tfl.nu/5zyt
  Replies (10) Good night (982) Bad night (339)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?

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  (616): is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear? http://tfl.nu/rzm1
  Replies (3) Good night (249) Bad night (427)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon

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  (919): It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon http://tfl.nu/hhjh
  Replies (0) Good night (250) Bad night (549)

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