Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
