420 ftw
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
